MUSLIM VILLA - QURAN ONLY

Category 5 => Commentary / Tafsir of specific Quranic Verses or Quran topics with detailed discussions => Topic started by: Zainab_M on March 09, 2010, 04:52:00 am



Title: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Zainab_M on March 09, 2010, 04:52:00 am
 


BismEm


Divorce laws in the Glorious Quran are simple and easy to follow. So, let's not make it complicated by wavering from the contents of the relevant Quranic verses.

First read on your own, verses 1 to 7 and then go over the following contents of this blog entry.

Separation:

"O Prophet! When you (men) put away women, put them away for their (legal) period and reckon the period, and keep your duty to Allah, your Rab. Expel them not from their houses nor let them go forth unless they commit open immorality. Such are the limits (imposed by) Allah; and whoso transgresses Allah's limits, he verily wrongs his soul. You know not: it may be that Allah will afterward bring some new thing to pass." 65:1

The above Verse 65:1 mentions about separation, as the first step, in case of differences between spouses. "put them away" could refer as sleeping in different rooms of the same home, or living in different homes.  This legal period of separation which is generally followed after 2 pronouncements of divorce and before the 3rd, is for a period of 4 months.  It's basically a decision-making period as clarified as follows.

Verse 2:226 mentions the legal period for separation which is 4 months.

"Those who forswear their wives must wait four months; then, if they change their mind, lo! Allah is Forgiving, Merciful." 2:226 Al-Baqrah

After separation:

"Then, when they have reached their term, take them back in kindness or part from them in kindness, and call to witness two just men among you, and keep your testimony upright for Allah. Whoso believes in Allah and the Last Day is exhorted to act thus. And whosoever keeps his duty to Allah, Allah will appoint a way out for him," 65:2.

The above Verse 65:2 is self-explanatory.  When the 4-month decision making period is over, the couple are required to make a definite decision.  Either the husband must decide to take back his wife or decide upon a divorce.  In either case it must be done with respect and kindness.

After the marriage is legally dissolved, physical intimacy becomes illegal. Thus, the 3-month waiting period for the woman (Verse 65:4) serves the purpose of determining the paternity of the unborn child, in case the divorced woman is in the very early stages of pregnancy at the time of divorce.  Do not confuse or mix-up the 4-month separation before divorce and the 3-month waiting period after an informal decision on divorce.  These are two very separate issues.

To know how careful The Almighty wants us to be in this regard, even the 3-month period (or Iddat) which is the unofficial decision on divorce does not annul the marriage until the 3 months have passed.  If the couple decide or desire reconciliation during this 3 month period, they can re-unite ..... as long as they decide before the expiry of 3 months.  For details read Divorce and remarriage between same couple. (http://muslimvilla.smfforfree.com/index.php?topic=5268.0)


Waiting period for women in case of divorce:

"And for such of your women as despair of menstruation, if you doubt, their period (of waiting) shall be three months along with those who have it not. And for those with child, their period shall be till they bring forth their burden. And whosoever keeps his duty to Allah, He makes his course easy for him." 65:4

All divorced women are to wait for 3 months following the divorce and prior to re-marriage (if they so decide), excepting those who are pregnant. Divorced pregnant women can re-marry soon after they have given birth. This law has to be strictly observed in all divorce cases. The importance has been further highlighted in Verse 65:5

Those who despair of menstruation are the ones who are menopausal.  Those who have it not refer to those who have not had menstruation because of some health problem or medical issues.

"That is the commandment of Allah which He reveals unto you. And whoso keeps his duty to Allah, He will remit from him his evil deeds and magnify reward for him." 65:5

P.S. This Verse 65:4 will be taken up again, later in this post, to explain another very essential point.

Responsibilities of the husband during separation:

"Lodge them where you dwell, according to your wealth, and harass them not so as to straiten life for them. And if they are with child, then spend for them till they bring forth their burden. Then, if they give suck for you, give them their due payment and consult together in kindness; but if you make difficulties for one another, then let some other woman give suck for him (the father of the child)." 65:6

"Let him who has abundance spend of his abundance, and he whose provision is measured, let him spend of that which Allah has given him. Allah asks naught of any soul save that which He has given it. Allah will vouchsafe, after hardship, ease." 65:7

Husbands must deal kindly and fairly with their spouses during such a period when their marriage is estranged and while they are in the process of making a decision. They are to keep their wives in their homes, not harass them and are responsible for their expenses according to their financial means. In case, the wife is pregnant, the husband has to be with her till she gives birth and must take full responsibility of caring for matters as is necessary in such a situation, according to his financial means. This includes hiring a female caretaker to breastfeed the baby, if necessary for whatever reasons.

AFTER DIVORCE, THE WOMAN CANNOT RE-MARRY HER EX-HUSBAND,UNLESS ..


"And if he has divorced her (the third time), then she is not lawful unto him thereafter until she hath wedded another husband. Then if he (the other husband) divorce her it is no sin for both of them that they come together again if they consider that they are able to observe the limits of Allah. These are the limits of Allah. He manifests them for people who have knowledge." 2:230

If the decision to divorce is pronounced the third time after / during the 4-month period of separation or after / during the 3-month period, then divorce is final and there can be no reconciliations.  The wife cannot return to the husband even if he changes his mind and wants her back.   In such a case, she can only re-marry her former husband after she's married to some other man and divorced again. It's also important to mention that her marriage and divorce to another man must NOT be a set-up, done with a pre-planned intent to return to her former husband.

PROVISION MUST FOR WOMEN EVEN IF DIVORCED BEFORE CONSUMMATION OF MARRIAGE

"It is no sin for you if you divorce women while yet ye have not touched them, nor appointed unto them a portion. Provide for them, the rich according to his means, and the straitened according to his means, a fair provision. (This is) a bounden duty for those who do good." (2:236)

"If you divorce them before you have touched them and you have appointed unto them a portion, then (pay the) half of that which you appointed, unless they (the women) agree to forgo it, or he agrees to forgo it in whose hand is the marriage tie. To forgo is nearer to piety. And forget not kindness among yourselves. Allah is Seer of what ye do." (2:237)

"For divorced women a provision in kindness: a duty for those who ward off (evil)." (2:241)

"O you who believe! If you wed believing women and divorce them before you have touched them, then there is no period that you should reckon. But content them and release them handsomely." (33:49)

All the above three verses of Surah Al-Baqrah (Verses 2:236, 237 and 241) convey the message that though divorce is allowed before the consummation of the marriage, yet, even in such a case, the woman MUST be given some compensation as her portion. If the marriage breaks off before consummation and the husband has not yet decided a portion of money or gift for her, then he will have to decide to give her something at that time.

DO NOT INTERFERE WITH THE LIVES OF DIVORCEES AND WIDOWS

And when ye have divorced women and they reach their term, place not difficulties in the way of their marrying their husbands if it is agreed between them in kindness. This is an admonition for him among you who believeth in Allah and the Last Day. That is more virtuous for you, and cleaner. Allah knoweth; ye know not. (2:232)

Such of you as die and leave behind them wives, they (the wives) shall wait, keeping themselves apart, four months and ten days. And when they reach the term (prescribed for them) then there is no sin for you in aught that they may do with themselves in decency. Allah is informed of what ye do. (2:234)

The above verses of Surah Al-Baqrah (2:232 and 234) confirm two aspects. First, divorced women are entitled to lead their own lives and re-marry of their own choice. Their ex-spouses or their families are not to interfere. Secondly, in case of widows, their waiting period before they decide to re-marry is 4 months and 10 days. Thus, the waiting period for widows is a bit longer than that required for divorcees, which is 3 months.


SUPPORTING WIDOWS

"(In the case of) those of you who are about to die and leave behind them wives, they should bequeath unto their wives a provision for the year without turning them out, but if they go out (of their own accord) there is no sin for you in that which they do of themselves within their rights. Allah is Mighty, Wise." [2:240]

Though widowhood and being divorced are two separate issue, Verse 2:240 about widows needs to be clarified. It involves the rights of widows. It's taken for those who are co-wives and do not have grown-up children to support them. In the 7th century (and probably even now) in polygamous families, if a man passed away leaving behind 2, 3 or 4 wives, and any of the wives are childless or with a minor child or children while the other wives (or wife) have adult children capable of earning and supporting the family (mainly sons in those days), they would sometimes refuse to support their father's widow or widows (or their stepmothers). Thus, this verse is a dictate saying that all such dependent widows have a right over their husband's families to support them financially for at least a year after their husband's death, unless they desire to leave on their own in a respectable manner.  And only Allah knows best.

THE NOBLE QURAN DOES NOT MENTION MARRIAGE OF UNDER-AGE GIRLS

"And for such of your women as despair of menstruation, if ye doubt, their period (of waiting) shall be three months, along with those who have it not. And for those with child, their period shall be till they bring forth their burden. And whosoever keepeth his duty to Allah, He maketh his course easy for him." 65:4 (Surah At-Talaq)

Coming back to Verse 65:4 of Surah At-Talaq (Divorce), the following point is very important to explain in detail.

As we can read, Verse 65:4 deals with the waiting period of divorcees. It does NOT make any references of marriage of under-aged females as wrongly and ignorantly claimed by various non-Muslims, and also by the equally unthinking Hadith adhering Muslims.

The portion of the Verse on focus is: "along with those who have it not." In original Quraanic Arabic it would read as:

واللائي لم يحضن

"waallaee lam yahidna" (transliteration)

Non-Muslim fundamentalist groups use this line of Ayat 65:4 as Quranic permission to wed under-aged girls, implying that it refers to pre-menstrual girls. Totally incorrect. They have either not understood this line or most likely, they intentionally misinterpret it.

It has also been observed that most traditionalists who take their guidance from Hadith rather than the Noble Quran, often interpret Verse 65:4 as permission to marry under-age (or pre-menstrual) females with the purpose of making it compatible with the Hadith which gives the wrong impression that child marriages were rampant throughout Islamic history. This idea is transmitted by Hadith through those several unauthentic narrations falsifying Aisha's (ra) age as six during the time of her marriage to the Prophet (SAAW) and nine at the time of consummation of marraige. For supporting these concocted narrations, many of our ulemas misinterpret the above mentioned portion of Verse 65:4 as a reference to minor girls.

Just for everyone's information, the story of Aisha's (ra) under-age marriage has long been proven wrong with concrete references and evidences as analysed by T.O. Shahnavaz in his article Was Aisha (ra) a six-year-old bride? The ancient myth exposed.

In truth, the expression of Verse 65:4 .. "along with those who have it not." refers to women who have reached/crossed the menstruating age but have not yet started to menstruate because of physiological problems/abnormalities. The Arabic insertion "lam" refers to "did not" or "does not" .. thus, referring to women who did not get their menarche when they came to that age and continued not to. The same expression also implies to women who had their menarche and continued to menstruate for some years, but then stopped because of physiological reasons or due to some illness. Hence, the meaning of "along with those who have it not" is that all such women who have stopped menstruating (for whatever reasons) before reaching menopause must wait for 3 months along with those who are menopausal. Further, those who are pregnant, must wait till they have given birth.

It's amazing to know that even in modern times, despite advanced medical treatments/procedures, there are many women who stop menstruating much before the normal menopausal age because of any number of medical reasons.

To explore the issue of absense of menses in young women or relatively young women well before the normal menopausal age, check the wealth of information contained in the online medical encyclopedia "Menstruation absent."

In the 7th century, the Glorious Quran took into consideration those aspects of the human body that are still under study at present. The efforts of those bent upon discrediting the Quran is only making them discredit themselves, exposing their own lack of knowledge in the 21st century about facts already referred to in the Quran in the 7th century.


Also check:

-  Triple divorce law - a wilful misinterpretation by Shariah (http://muslimvilla.smfforfree.com/index.php?topic=2436.msg6804#msg6804)
-  Source of the misinterpreted 'triple divorce law' (http://muslimvilla.smfforfree.com/index.php?topic=2437.0)
-  Don't interfere with lives of divorcees (http://muslimvilla.smfforfree.com/index.php?topic=1373.0)
-  Divorced woman cannot remarry previous husband (http://muslimvilla.smfforfree.com/index.php?topic=4802.0)
-  Provision for divorced women before consummation of marriage (http://muslimvilla.smfforfree.com/index.php?topic=1374.0)



Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Ruhi_Rose on March 15, 2010, 03:25:06 am
Very goood .. awesome post!  thanks sis.  Does it mean that if the husband pronounces talaq twice, then that's somewhat same as separation, until he pronounces divorce the third time to make it final (if he decides to do that)? 

Also, if the woman wants the divorce, does she also have to pronounce it thrice?


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Zainab_M on March 17, 2010, 02:38:32 am
Does it mean that if the husband pronounces talaq twice, then that's somewhat same as separation, until he pronounces divorce the third time to make it final (if he decides to do that)? 


Yes, after two pronouncements it's separation for reconsidering the matter for 4 months as clarified in Verse 2:226. (http://www.khayma.com/librarians/call2islaam/quran/pickthall/surah2.html)  I would add that the Glorious Quran is very cautious in matters of divorce.  The three pronounciations of talaq have to be spaced over a period of 4 months to give the wife & husband time for reconciliation by thinking and discussing the matter with family, friends and lawyers.  Also, this time is essential to determine if the wife is pregnant or not.  Unfortunately, the Shariah is misusing this law.  In many Muslim countries, against the dictates of the Quran, men are being allowed to divorce their wives by pronouncing talaq thrice in one breath.  Because of this violation of the Quranic law, many homes & families have been destroyed.  This violatory practice of immediate triple divorce is particularly widespread among Sunnis with legal validity by completely ignoring the Quran.  In modern times, some so-called Muslim men have sunk so low that they even use the immediate triple divorce practice through phone, email or cell phone text messaging.  For this reason, some jurists call it Talaq-e-Bidah (innovative divorce).  Such a system is a gross misinterpretation of the Noble Quran.

Also, if the woman wants the divorce, does she also have to pronounce it thrice?

Well, no.  The woman doesn't have to make three pronouncements but I would presume that the rest of the procedure is the same, that is first separation of 4 months to reconsider the matter.   If she then decides not to return to her husband, she is free to make her decision and ask for divorce.  Then, after divorce, she must wait for 3 months before she can remarry.  If she's pregnant, she must wait till she's given birth.       


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Ruhi_Rose on March 17, 2010, 08:25:17 pm
Thanks sis.  this was very useful.  and I was about to put my next question about this immediate triple divorce.  Indeed it's so common and I was just wondering does this connote to a correct interpretation?  now, after putting together all verses on divorce, it's clear.  As usual, this immediate triple pronouncion of divorce is a total misinterpretation.

Okay, now what I would like to know next is - supposing, when the husband pronounces divorce first time, or second time, and after waiting for 4 months there's no reconciliation and both decide to divorce.  Then after a few years they decide to re-marry each other.  In such a case, will the woman still be required to marry & divorce someone else in order to be able to re-marry her first husband?  Because, the understanding from the above verses is that she is not lawful for her husband if he divorces her a third time unless she marries and happens to get divorced from another man.  But what if divorce takes place after the first or second pronounciation?


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Zainab_M on March 18, 2010, 11:56:03 pm

Okay, now what I would like to know next is - supposing, when the husband pronounces divorce first time, or second time, and after waiting for 4 months there's no reconciliation and both decide to divorce.  Then after a few years they decide to re-marry each other.  In such a case, will the woman still be required to marry & divorce someone else in order to be able to re-marry her first husband?  Because, the understanding from the above verses is that she is not lawful for her husband if he divorces her a third time unless she marries and happens to get divorced from another man.  But what if divorce takes place after the first or second pronounciation?


  According to the divorce rules in the Quran as I've understood, that dictate of marrying & getting divorced from someone else before remarrying her former husband will not be required if they re-unite after the first or second pronouncements of divorce by the man.  Thus, legally, divorce cannot take place after first and second pronouncements.  It can only result in separation to give both the spouses time to re-think their decisions. This has a time limit of 4 months.  At this point they can decide one way or another.  If divorce is decided, then yes, she cannot re-marry him unless she marries someone else and that marriage too ends in divorce.  In this case she's now free to marry the first husband.

But as we know, according to the distortions of Shariah, three pronouncements of divorce means 3 successive verbal sentences saying "I divorce you" which can be done in a few seconds.  This is definitely a gross misinterpretation and completely un-Quranic.

 


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Ruhi_Rose on December 29, 2011, 01:20:33 am
Thanks sis for taking this up again on my request yesterday.  We're having a discussion on this in our Muslim sisters' community center next week.  Many sisters are not clear about it.  They are very eager to get the facts straight.  I thought I'd try to explain to them from this very explicit piece you've penned.  I guess I'll print it because all those additional topics you've titled with green are also important. 

Just to re-cap the rules on divorce (talaq) as elucidated in the Quran:

-  If things go wrong between a couple, and the husband pronounces divorce once, and then again a second time which could be a few days or weeks later, then after this second pronouncement they are to separate for a stipulated period of 4 months to re-think their decision cooly.  Also if during this period it's discovered that the wife is pregnant, it's advisable for the husband to take her back or it's advisable for them to mutually reconcile.

-  If the husband is still not happy and wants to go ahead with divorce, he will pronounce "divorce" to his wife a third time after these 4 months have passed.  Then the divorce becomes final.  Or, if he is willing to take her back but she isn't willing to return, then too divorce will have to be finalized because he cannot force her to stay in the marriage if she wants to quit.

-  So, now, presuming that divorce is finalized, the woman has to wait for 3 months before re-marrying someone else.  The purpose of this is to determine whether the woman is pregnant or not.   If she's pregnant, then she has to wait until she's given birth before considering to re-marry.  Even if she's not pregnant, she does need to wait for 3 months for a final confirmation that she's not expecting a baby.

-  Then after these 3 months have passed, she's free to re-marry.

-  And that idea of repeating "I divorce u" in one breath is not allowed.



Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Zainab_M on December 29, 2011, 01:29:29 am
Great!  that's a pretty cool summary. 

People do sometimes get confused though if you carefully study it and then analyse the points verse-wise as we've done here, it's really quite simple. 

I too think it will be a good idea to print the post.  Also print your re-cap as it will be useful to go over it after you've explained the details. 

Best of luck for your discussion, dear sis.  :)  It's a very good practice to talk over matters from the Quran.  It helps immensely to learn the facts of the Quran better.


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Ruhi_Rose on December 29, 2011, 01:32:14 am
Many thanks dear sis Zeynab  :) 

Allah bless and guide all of us. 


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Heba E. Husseyn on December 29, 2011, 01:59:06 am
Best of luck for the discussion sis Rose  :)   I'm glad both u and brother PT are regularly participating in Quranic discussions.  It helps so much. 


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Heba E. Husseyn on January 01, 2012, 04:30:14 am
Btw, sister Rose, add one more point to your brief re-cap.

It would go like this. 

- Stipulated time for separation 4 months
- Waiting time after divorce and before re-marriage 3 months
- At widowhood waiting time before re-marriage 4 months and 10 days

Though that last bit on widowhood is different from divorce yet it has a waiting period of 4 months and 10 days.  To remember it is better otherwise one might confuse this time period with other issues.


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Ruhi_Rose on January 03, 2012, 05:27:27 am
Ahah ,, thanks a lot sister Heba.  Your re-cap is better than mine.  For a summary I'll keep a print of that. 


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: muslima on July 30, 2012, 05:43:37 am
mashallah sister zeynab you detailed on each point very carefully may allah reward you for such efforts .

Allah will not take you to task for that which is unintentional in your oaths. But He will take you to task for that which your hearts have garnered. Allah is Forgiving, Clement.2:225

divine law is so balanced for both (men and women) .Islam does not keep a couple tied in a loathsome chain to a painful and agonising position, instead it permits divorce.It should only be resorted to when it becomes humanly impossible and due to unavoidable circumstances

O ye who believe! It is not lawful for you forcibly to inherit the women (of your deceased kinsmen), nor (that) ye should put constraint upon them that ye may take away a part of that which ye have given them, unless they be guilty of flagrant lewdness. But consort with them in kindness, for if ye hate them it may happen that ye hate a thing wherein Allah hath placed much good.4:19
 
And if ye wish to exchange one wife for another and ye have given unto one of them a sum of money (however great), take nothing from it. Would ye take it by the way of calumny and open wrong4:20
 
If a woman feareth ill treatment from her husband, or desertion, it is no sin for them twain if they make terms of peace between themselves. Peace is better. But greed hath been made present in the minds (of men). If ye do good and keep from evil, lo! Allah is ever Informed of what ye do4:128
 
But if they separate, Allah will compensate each out of His abundance. Allah is ever All-Embracing, All-Knowing.4:130

Divorce is not a game, it is very very serious and a huge responsibility for a man so carry your responsibility in a manner which justifies its seriousness.Some men throw it around like its nothing, it is those men whom are always full of regrets when an irrevocable divorce is pronounced.divorce .his wife a maximum of three times, dose not mean thrice in one sitting 2.229 (A divorce is only permissible twice) it's clear statement No confusion here A divorce is only permissible twice is perfect divine law, to safe family unit why sharia/men made laws interfere  ^:( Allah addresses men asking them to try hard to keep the marriage.even if they dislike their wives in divine law giving time period to re consider Giving three or more divorces in one sitting is contrary to the procedure of divorce laid down by Allah in the Quran.If one does so, he is a great sinner hastened in the divorce by pronouncing three or more divorces in one sitting will complete the divorce fully and make it irrevocable. if men have been giving right to divorse so there is punishment too because hallala( raj'i (returnable) is moslty hights and toughest punishment  for muslim men by allah honestly i personaly like this divine justice  ;D .so keeping the unity of the family is considered a priority for the sake of the children. For this reason, divorce is always a last choice.

I hope that people of the Islamic faith will learn on divorce and become aware of the controversial practice within Muslim marriages of the triple pronouncement of Talaq at one occasion is UnIslamic and UnQuranic. If we are true believers in Allah and His Messenger, let us be content with the decision already made by Allah and His Messenger. As Allah Himself says:
 
And it becometh not a believing man or a believing woman, when Allah and His messenger have decided an affair (for them), that they should (after that) claim any say in their affair; and whoso is rebellious to Allah and His messenger, he verily goeth astray in error manifest.33:36


But nay, by thy Lord, they will not believe (in truth) until they make thee judge of what is in dispute between them and find within themselves no dislike of that which thou decidest, and submit with full submission4:65

it must be said that in present times, Islam is being undermined and destroyed not by non-Muslims but by Muslims .


 Say: O People of the Scripture! Why drive ye back believers from the way of Allah, seeking to make it crooked, when ye are witnesses (to Allah's guidance)? Allah is not unaware of what ye do3:99


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: muslima on July 30, 2012, 05:46:11 am
Thanks sis for taking this up again on my request yesterday.  We're having a discussion on this in our Muslim sisters' community center next week.  Many sisters are not clear about it.  They are very eager to get the facts straight.  I thought I'd try to explain to them from this very explicit piece you've penned.  I guess I'll print it because all those additional topics you've titled with green are also important. 

Just to re-cap the rules on divorce (talaq) as elucidated in the Quran:

-  If things go wrong between a couple, and the husband pronounces divorce once, and then again a second time which could be a few days or weeks later, then after this second pronouncement they are to separate for a stipulated period of 4 months to re-think their decision cooly.  Also if during this period it's discovered that the wife is pregnant, it's advisable for the husband to take her back or it's advisable for them to mutually reconcile.

-  If the husband is still not happy and wants to go ahead with divorce, he will pronounce "divorce" to his wife a third time after these 4 months have passed.  Then the divorce becomes final.  Or, if he is willing to take her back but she isn't willing to return, then too divorce will have to be finalized because he cannot force her to stay in the marriage if she wants to quit.

-  So, now, presuming that divorce is finalized, the woman has to wait for 3 months before re-marrying someone else.  The purpose of this is to determine whether the woman is pregnant or not.   If she's pregnant, then she has to wait until she's given birth before considering to re-marry.  Even if she's not pregnant, she does need to wait for 3 months for a final confirmation that she's not expecting a baby.

-  Then after these 3 months have passed, she's free to re-marry.

-  And that idea of repeating "I divorce u" in one breath is not allowed.



very helpful summary  Thumbsup


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Zainab_M on July 30, 2012, 08:41:01 pm
Your welcomed and I also thank you for your very thoughtful comments, sister Muslima.  Allah has made so many provisions for the benefit of both the wife and husband.   But as Allah has so correctly referred in Verse 4:128 that greed in the minds of men has destroyed their morals.  In particular, Muslims in Pakistan and India have deviated the most.  They have completely commercialized the institution of marriage by coercing the family of the future wife to pay almost all expenses of the marriage.  This is a gross violation of the Quran.  According to Quranic Laws, all expenses must be paid by the future husband and also the dowry or wedding gifts.  Additionally, also as the quoted Verses assert, that in case of a divorce, the husband is not allowed to take anything back unless the wife returns it of her own free will.  In South Asian Muslim marriages the question of the man not taking anything back from his wife does not even arise because they hardly give anything to their wives.  Instead it's the wife's family who is compelled to give everything as a wedding tradition. 

Indeed marriage is a serious union between a man and woman.  It cannot be taken lightly.  That's the reason why Allah has put the condition that divorced couples cannot re-unite unless the woman re-marries and divorces another man for personal reasons, not as a planned set-up for the purpose of re-marrying her former husband.  People in the west have made marriage such a joke .. particularly in Hollywood where reports have come of couples divorcing and then re-marrying whenever they desire.   The Quranic verses you quoted are immensely helpful and explain so much, Alhumdulilah.  Also, as you rightly stated, Muslims are violating the laws of Allah just as much as the non-Muslims.   I had put up an article of mine in my blog titled Triple Divorce Law - a willful misinterpretation by Shariah. (http://zainabslounge.blogspot.ca/2010/03/triple-divorce-law-wilful.html)   One Muslim man responded in the comment section by asking  that he wanted to divorce his wife with the condition of being able to re-marry her after a few years.  He said he consulted a "maulana" for advise and the maulana allowed him to divorce and remarry his former wife anytime he wishes, telling him that all he needs to do is to write "talaq-e-bain" on his divorce document.  The man asked me if the maulana's advise was correct.  I was shocked to read this.  This is how Muslims distort the Quranic Laws.  There's no such thing as "talaq-e-bain" in the Noble Quran and nor have I ever heard of it before.  I told that man that the maulana was a crook and not to follow his advise.  The Noble Quran has clearly stated the condition in case divorced couples want to re-marry and that cannot change. 


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: muslima on August 01, 2012, 12:34:39 pm
MashaAllah sister zeynab i must say you are a guiding light Allah bless u . i have read ur article on ur blog can we post comment there too ?? or its same if comment here on mv  ?? if u want i will paste this comment there too .
you are absulotly right maulana is crook.astaghfirullah these malanas are munafiQs in quran Allah gives us very clear portrayal of these hypocrite and warn us .People who do not seek guidance from the Quran and follow scholar's opinion are addressed by the following verses

They make their faith a pretext so that they may turn (men) from the way of Allah. Verily evil is that which they are wont to do 63:2

And when thou seest them their figures please thee; and if they speak thou givest ear unto their speech. (They are) as though they were blocks of wood in striped cloaks. They deem every shout to be against them. They are the enemy, so beware of them. Allah confound them! How they are perverted 63:4

And when it is said unto them: Make not mischief in the earth, they say: We are peacemakers only.2:11

Are not they indeed the mischief-makers? But they perceive not.2:12

tripple divorce  in one sitting is a highly sensitive issue as it can break years of marital relations between husband and wife.its totally irrevocable men made sharia law is full of errors.Sunni sharia law of triple divorce in one sitting is against women to give her secondry status .its not a joke if women labilized divorced once socity torture her .divorced women suffer in social burden and what about those of the children born to them from their broken marriages ?? always seeking a virgin mindset muslim men's never accept the divorced wome and in some cases men just pronounce triple divorce in their anger and later they feel like loser. they want to re -unite ,they want their wife back but they cant go through the punishment of hallala( raj'i (returnable).They wouldn't want their wives to sleep with someone else before taking them back.its hard for muslim men thats why many of them plan marriages against divine law.(Without hallala) or try to find unlawful solution.  isn't more worse situation ??..these are such a horrible result of man made sharia.

divine law is family law it deals with the process of divorce in a balanced and phased manner comprising a three month time frame, so that this most agonizing experience in a person’s life is faced in a balanced, and there is no bitterness and ill feelings between the erstwhile spouses.we can see the clear diffrence and basd effects if we go against divine Law.This practice of triple divorce is very destructive to marriages and makes a mockery out of the rules of the deen



Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Zainab_M on August 01, 2012, 08:53:19 pm
MashAllah sister Muslima.  You have truly understood this topic very accurately and correctly.  And I so much agree with you that divorced women in the traditional Muslim society are generally left feeling very secluded.  Even though the Noble Quran gives divorced women full rights within the bounds of decency just as it does to men, yet because of the chain of bid'ah introduced by Hadith and fatwas, unfortunately our Muslim society has gotten quite male-dominated by violating the important principles of the Great Quran.  And of course, when divorced women are discriminated, automatically their monor children who are in their custody suffer too.  Although the Noble Quran is full of responsibilities for divorced men, yet divorced men are often comforted and taught by their imams that they don't owe anything to their divorced wives and children who are with their mothers.  It only shows how little the Muslims know about the Noble Quran and how little they desire to understand it.  


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Heba E. Husseyn on August 01, 2012, 08:59:28 pm
I know a Muslim couple who got divorced a few years ago when their 2 children were in their late teens.  The husband got married to someone else and cut off all links with his former wife and children, even though he hasn't legally divorced his first wife.  Not just that, but since he left, he hasn't paid a dime as financial compensation to his family whom he deserted.  His daughter got married recently and he didn't even attend her wedding, let alone contributing financially  which was his bounden duty as a believer.  This is the condition of Muslims today and an evidence of how far they have drifted from the Quran.


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: MuslimanMahlon on August 02, 2012, 01:48:35 am
How unfortunate..


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: MuslimanMahlon on August 02, 2012, 01:54:21 am
To go through all those years of marriage, raisin' kids... And to turn out coldhearted like that.


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Heba E. Husseyn on August 02, 2012, 02:41:57 am
Exactly, so incredibly cold hearted.


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Zainab_M on August 02, 2012, 03:05:43 am
Something very similar happened to a lady I know who is a good friend of mine living in my country of origin.  Her husband of 20 years left her and their three children for another woman whom he married.  He's legally also married to his first wife but never sees her nor the children.  Usually in such cases if the first wife wants to marry another man, she has to take a divorce without consulting her husband personally through her lawyer.  In most such cases the husband gives a difficult time, refusing to sign the divorce papers or simply not responding only to harass her .. no other reason.  These folks aren't just aware how firmly such behavior has been prohibited in the Quran.   The problem with these societies is that since they're run on the basis of the man-written Shariah, the laws are totally lopsided, only favoring the men.  Anything man-made or man-written can never be properly balanced like the Divine Law.  In the West it's the opposite of these so-called Muslim countries .. the other extreme.  The law favors women wholly and divorce often becomes an ordeal for the husband.  Many men end up getting financially broke for the rest of their lives, because the legal authorities try to squeeze out as large a slice of the financial settlement as possible from the husband so that the government can save on allowances to divorced women.  Thus, in both societies it involves the selfish interest of law-makers.

If we carefully read the divorce laws in the Quran, that brings an excellent balance between the two explaining that divorce, separation nor the couple's children should be the cause of suffering or burden for the wife nor the husband.  


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Heba E. Husseyn on August 02, 2012, 03:15:03 am
Very true sis. 


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: MuslimanMahlon on August 02, 2012, 03:30:51 am
And with divorce, the Qur'an always follows up with the message of treating your ex with kindness, by all means necessary.

"When ye have divorced women, and they have reached their term, then retain them in kindness or release them in kindness. Retain them not to their hurt so that ye transgress (the limits). He who doeth that hath wronged his soul. Make not the revelations of Allah a laughing-stock (by your behaviour), but remember Allah's grace upon you and that which He hath revealed unto you of the Scripture and of wisdom, whereby He doth exhort you. Observe your duty to Allah and know that Allah is Aware of all things." Surah 2:231

"And when ye have divorced women and they reach their term, place not difficulties in the way of their marrying their husbands if it is agreed between them in kindness. This is an admonition for him among you who believeth in Allah and the Last Day. That is more virtuous for you, and cleaner. Allah knoweth; ye know not." Surah 2:232

"If ye divorce them before ye have touched them and ye have appointed unto them a portion, then (pay the) half of that which ye appointed, unless they (the women) agree to forgo it, or he agreeth to forgo it in whose hand is the marriage tie. To forgo is nearer to piety. And forget not kindness among yourselves. Allah is Seer of what ye do." Surah 2:237

"For divorced women a provision in kindness: a duty for those who ward off (evil)." Surah 2:241


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: Zainab_M on August 02, 2012, 03:54:48 am
Yes brother, these were precisely the Verses I was referring to.  Thanks a lot for quoting them.   It's so obvious how much emphasis the Quran applies on the aspect of compassionate treatment toward divorced women and mutual kindness .. not to make trouble for them after divorce.  Unfortunately not a single Muslim country today cares the least nor even remembers these verses.  No wonder divorce rules in Muslim countries are so different from what's mentioned in the Quran.   And worst of all are the South Asian Muslims who have borrowed many social traditions from the kufar of India.  They don't even pay for the dowry .. not even a portion it.  Instead they make the bride pay for all expenses of the marriage and in case of a divorce do not return a dime of what she spent on her husband.  


Title: Re: Divorce in the Glorious Quran
Post by: muslima on August 03, 2012, 03:38:30 am
stone hearted shameless people ^:(  Exactly! majority of muslim men's carry careless  attitude towards X-wife and childrens .ONLY Women suffer most in divorce cases.
everyone will be questioned..

Lo! those who expect not the meeting with Us but desire the life of the world and feel secure therein, and those who are neglectful of Our revelations,10:7

Lo! they who persecute believing men and believing women and repent not, theirs verily will be the doom of hell, and theirs the doom of burning 85:10

Lo! the punishment of thy Lord is stern. 85:12