HOw to respond if child asked a question about gay Or lesbian ?

[muslima]

Dad, my Friends are Gay"





 


His lecture reminds me general discussion in our sitting but i would say mother and father both are responsible to teach their children. The topic was ! how to respond child if she / he (age 7 to 10 )asked about sex? i don't understand why parents get shout if child asked a question about gay or lesbian,Why parents  become so irretating by saying how could u asked such embarrassing question ?  where from u learn these bad words ? never ask such dirty question again ?  I mean what the hell why people do this ?


Q: My Question is Should we recite Astaghfar or respond them ?


First of all i feel don't overlook it's Not stupid generation and regarding any info from the age of 6 their brain works 1000 times faster than we can not even imagine ,second it's not surprising at all at frist place media is nude enough to mislead children's so if child of any age ask this kind of question it is clear sing that whether u consider or not they already have got more or less info about it , probably has heard about homosexuality from school, magazines, on internet also it is not uncommon to find people of the same sex kissing on the cheeks, hugging, or holding hand .simply that's why question raised  so a child must not confuse in real Halal affection between his brothers or her sisters,right and wrong  and since it is openly discussed in the Quran We have no excuse as Muslim parents, teachers, community or as individuals ,well it's not easy but it can be explained in another way! just tell them ! Allah telling us that homosexuality is wrong , just as He tells us consuming alcohol is wrong and whatever Allah forbid for us in Quran it's harm we must not do that If we Love Allah ( and continue work on ur child according to his/her age and understandings tell them about the nation of prophet Lut pbuh!

And Lot! (Remember) when he said unto his folk: Will ye commit abomination such as no creature ever did before you? ...  Lo! ye come with lust unto men instead of women. Nay, but ye are wanton folk. Quran 7:80 to 81 . Improve their trust in Allah that He knows best what our true needs and desires are. He also knows what is good and bad for us so behave positively to guide ur child rightly ,being parent educate urself first , built abilty in urself  first to answer ur child say something to satisfied them rather than keeping suspected silence or running out of them .Explain them right there if it's possible or in any other suitable time but do not ignore because if u think ur child will not investigate than u are fooling urself better to educate them via Quran right from the beginning Must Tell them limit and boundaries settled by Allah in Quran for believers before ur child  boy or girl get wrong information from bad or wrong sources.Don't get shout or irritate if u don't guide them they will try to understand via porn movies also and their friends will surely help them. Don't get them wrong  if they ask such question be thankful of them  at least they have asked u , told u and u get alarmed !! Wake up manage little time for ur kids as well ..


That's what i think any more suggestions how to deal with ? 

[Zainab_M]

I absolutely understand your point of view and I agree with it 100% sister Muslima.  Nowadays many Muslims are living as immigrants in the West where same gender relationships and marriages are legalized.  These Haram couples are also allowed to adopt orphan children.  Therefor, in primary schools in the West, children coming from foster or adopted homes of same sex couples often become the colleagues of Muslim children.  That's how many Muslim children, though they're being taught Faith orientation at home, come in contact with those kids who say both their parents are males or both are females.  Consequently the Muslim child gets confused, asking questions from their dad and mom when they return home after school.  Muslim parents are required to answer these questions carefully.  Quranic references on the total prohibition of same gender relationships/marriages are essential to highlight the Haram aspect of the culture of gays & lesbians.  Muslim parents need to handle the explanation to guide their children in accordance with the age of their kids.  Kids between 7 and 10 are very young.  They need to be explained in simple words with simple examples as proofs of its violation.  As these kids grow older, their parents can go deeper to gradually highlight all the negative affects of this culture and its negative impact on human morals.

It's true that external environment is a challenge for parents, particularly those living in the West.   It also limits the abilities of parents in guiding their children.  I'm sure all good and conscientious parents would teach the best to their kids in accordance with the rules of our Faith.  But as these kids grow older and spend more time with friends and in secular institutions outdoors, parents cannot possibly follow their children everywhere they go.  There comes a point when the parents must feel that they have done their job to the maximum in teaching the rules of right conduct to their children, and when these children reach the age of 18, they will need to guide themselves with the help of Quranic information and their will-power, the foundation of which was already made in their lives when they were younger.  Parents can play a role to choose the friends for their kids as long as the kids are young, below 15.  But when they are older, it's impossible for parents to continue playing the same role.  If the children choose the path of misguidance after 18 despite being given good lessons by parents prior to that, the forceful intrusion of parents to change the lifestyle of their children might not help and on the contrary might result in greater stubbornness and rebellion from their adult children.   If some children tend to get distracted to misguidance after adulthood, it's not the fault of the parents.  In that case, those adult children will have to answer to Allah for themselves.

Another point. Many modernists or so-called 'progressive' Muslim sites like Free Minds etc. are working a lot of corruption concerning the topic on same sex relations.  By grossly misinterpreting Quranic translations, they are claiming that the Quran does not say anything to disallow this culture.  They also claim that "instincts" of same gender relations is a "natural" bent of mind within certain humans and therefore not a sin.  AstaghfarAllah! It just shows how manipulative and evil some modernists are.  In the Noble Quran, Allah Almighty has confirmed it loud & clear that same gender relations is absolutely lewd and Haram.  There can be NO two ways about it.   In this connection sister Heba has put up a post by compiling all Quranic references that assert without any doubts that same gender relations are completely HARAM and the lame excuse of "natural instincts" is NO reason to justify it. 
 
Same Sex Relationship NOT Allowed in the Noble Quran:
http://muslimvilla.smfforfree.com/index.php?topic=480.0

Many thanks for the post, sister Muslima.  Allah bless.

As-salaam Alaikum.

[muslima]

  dear sis zeynab u are welcom


JazakAllah kahir dear sis am grateful for ur very encouraging and bralliant respons as i was expecting.  I am completely agree with u word by word .Ur explanation is much better than mine . yeah good parenting as muslim is big challang in west i accetp but many of are doing really good Alhumdulliah . U are right .Quranic education is very helpful indeed , if parents love, read,understand and live Quran and teach their children every thing straight from Quran with proof from Quran verses and discuss  every issue via Quran references it helps and it will inshallah help . I have saw many mothers especially those who don't want to talk abut such tropic which is wrong,and it upsets me.  please sisters / brothers must talk to ur child ,none knows what ur child will going to choose for his/ her life but if u tell them everything when it's required then u won't feel guilty later on  ! that  i should have talk to them at that time ,why i didn't said this or that , u won't  feel any regret for the time have been passed so As parents ,as a first teacher of ur child must answer their Question from Quran alone the only straight path right guidance  rest yes As U said sis zeynab i like it very much !! If some children tend to get distracted to misguidance after adulthood, it's not the fault of the parents.  In that case, those adult children will have to answer to Allah for themselves. MashAllah  .


And no burdened soul can bear another's burden, and if one heavy laden crieth for (help with) his load, naught of it will be lifted even though he (unto whom he crieth) be of kin 35:18

O mankind! Keep your duty to your Lord and fear a Day when the parent will not be able to avail the child in aught, nor the child to avail the parent. Lo! Allah's promise is the very truth. Let not the life of the world beguile you, nor let the deceiver beguile you, in regard to Allah.31:33


May Allah grant help to parents those who are really concerned about their responsibility and shower His mercy on kids to guide them  Ameen


 @That must be educative one i will read this sis heba's post very soon inshAllah thank sister


Dear sister zeynab May Allah grant U uncountable rewards for this noble cause ameen