Is baby shower Halal for Muslims?

[Eroosa]

Salam to all.  is this common baby shower party Halal?  Can you please tell what is the aim of this party and its roots. Is it ok for Muslims to celebrate it?

[Ruhi_Rose]

Walaykum As-Salam.  Briefly put, baby shower is a happy get-together to celebrate the future birth of a baby.  Celebrating the coming of a baby with joy and happiness is an approach that does not go against the values of the Noble Quran, unless it is celebrated in a manner that violates the rules and principles of the Noble Quran.  In that case it will be Haram.

Celebrating the birth of a baby is an old social custom which existed in ancient times in various communities and cultures.  All communities had their own different rituals.  Many of those ancient celebrations were Haram and very different compared to the modern baby shower we see at present.  The modern baby shower in North America is a women-only social get-together, an occasion celebrated with refreshments and gifts for the baby.

A Halal baby shower should be a sisters-only party usually celebrated when the mother is 6 to 8 months pregnant. It should consist of Halal foods and gifts for the unborn baby such as infant clothing, toys and milk bottle.  To further confirm the event as Halal, begin with the name of Allah and the recitation of the Noble Quran, and direct all your du’a toward Allah and none else.  This is the description of a Halal baby shower.

The celebration will be Haram if it includes the following practices:

-  pagan rituals worshipping other deities
-  superstitious practices
-  rituals having pagan roots
-  indecent acts
-  Haram foods or Haram drinks.
 
Either all or any one of these above mentioned points will deem the party completely Haram.

[Eroosa]

Thanks interesting.  Can mehram men of the family participate?

[Ruhi_Rose]

Yes there's nothing wrong with the presence of mehram men.  It's just that the lady who is expecting the baby is heavily pregnant and at such times women feel more comfortable in women-only parties.

[Gazala]

In modern times is this custom also in Europe?

[Ruhi_Rose]

From what I know, presently it's typically a North American event.  Arrival of newborns was also marked in Europe.  However, medieval and ancient Europe was quite conservative.  Pregnancy was viewed as something private and the celebration usually took place after the baby’s birth.  For ancient Christians, baptism was a sort of baby shower.

[Eroosa]

In India the event is called "lap filling" in which close members of the family among guests keep fruits like an apple or orange or small bunch of grapes on the lap of the pregnant woman as a symbol of having more children in future, children on the mother's lap.  Is this practice Halal or Haram?

[Zainab_M]

It is absolutely HARAM.  This involves superstition.  In other words, asking for blessings through superstitious practices, a very wrong approach.  Superstitions are completely fake or false (باطل).   It is only ALLAH ALMIGHTY Who distributes blessings.  No one else and nothing else has the power to grant blessings.  Thus, as Sister Ruhi stated, a Halal baby shower must begin in the name of Allah, with recitations of the Quran or offering 2 or 4 rakahs of prayer and making du'a to Allah only.  After that, the invitees can have refreshments and then unpack the gifts.  The party should then finish.  No need to make it lengthy and extravagant either.

Filling the lap and all such deluded and fake practices must be completely avoided as they are patently HARAM.

[Eroosa]

Right, understand.

[Saleeha]

What does "mehram" mean please?

[Ruhi_Rose]

‘Mehram’ alludes to those family relationships where marriage is permanently forbidden (Haram) such as a woman’s father, brothers, sons, uncles (maternal and paternal), sons-in-law, grandfather, great-grandfather, grandsons, great-grandsons.   This point is clearly stated in Surah An-Nur Verse 24:31 based on close ties of blood. Cousins, though also blood relatives by definition, are not mahram because their blood relationship is distant compared to the ones mentioned above.  The only two people who may not be blood relatives but are mahram are the husband and husband’s father (woman’s father-in-law).  Husband is mahram because he is already married to the woman and his father is a paternal father-figure for his wife.  Therefore they are both mahram even though not necessarily blood relatives.  Also, stepfather married to the mother is also mahram for the mother's daughters for the same reason.

[Saleeha]

yeh, I read you, thanks very much.